This year has a lot of first for me. First miscarriage. First D&C. First time in OT. First time being administered general anesthetic. First time being out cold and having no idea what were done to me (esp down yonder). First time being inserted with a contraceptive device.
Life is full of first times no matter how old you are.
Decided to go to Annur Hospital Bangi for a follow up check and scan coz its nearer to home. Went for a check up on Monday and was referred to Dr Fatimah. I like her. She is thorough with her explanation. Did not rush me while I related the history from my clear discharge to the blood clot despite it being the first day of Ramadhan and it was nearly 4pm.
During scanning she noticed a lot more tissues were still inside my womb. "Dang", i thought I could go back to normality. She gave me 2 options: (1) to let it come out naturally which may take weeks or months; or (2) do a D&C to clean the womb. Both comes with risks. Option (1) may lead to infection and option (2) I have to go under general anesthetic which has its own set of risks. After a brief contemplation, I decided to just go for it. Get it over and done with. At least I have a definite time to heal rather than the waiting for everything to come out with a risk that it may not come out completely and I would still need to go for D&C. Cut short process senang. Settle. She also asked if I want to get pregnant again, the question to which had me shaking my head as fast as the japanese bullet train. No no no no no no. This is it. We stop here. According to her I still can, I just need to give my womb a breather for 3 months before trying again. No no no no no no was my answer and I asked about contraception. She said it can be done. I can insert it during the minor op. Yes, problem settled.
So the minor op was scheduled the next day (tuesday 7/6/2016) which is the 2nd day of Ramadhan. I was to go and register myself at 5.30am and the op will be done at 7.30am. Wahh pepagi sebelum subuh tu. So we rushed through our sahur, Dropped Ariz off with the babysitter and reached the hospital at 5.30am. Tapi GL pulak buat hal and due the hiccups, we had to wait for the GL to be cleared first. I was registered into a four bedded ward. Tak nak demand lelebih since GL tak lepas lagi despite my entitlement of a single bedded room. Tak pe lah, Day procedure je pun. Since the GL fiasco was settled quite late at around 7.30am, my op had to be postponed to 4pm. Fuhh jenuh jugak nak menunggu. Dah la puasa since 12am last nite. Now I had to start puasa from 10am. Dapat la makan biskut sikit, minum air sikit utk energy. Requested to balik rumah dulu. Dr said OK. I had to sign a discharge against advice form, tak kisah lah tu sbb tak buat apa2 pun lagi and had to come back at 2pm.
note: if you ever have to go through a D&C, do shave your pubic hair beforehand. I was not told of this the day before and the nurse said she will have to do it for me. Ish, kesian lah pulak kat nurse so I said tak pe, let me do it, you just check if satisfactory or not.
Went back again at 2pm and settled down. At around 3pm I was asked to go down to the OT. My last meal was at 9.30am (nasi hujan panas semalam kot. Tapi semangkuk kecik toet je la nak perabis sisa2 sahur). I was supposed to be on a 6 hour fast. Dah depa kata op at 4pm last makan at 10am, Tup2 nak buat op at 3pm, mana aku tauuuu. The reason for the 6 hour fasting rule according to dr bius is to minimise incidents where patient vomit during op while under general anesthetic. But we went ahead with the op.
note: before going into OT all jewelries must be taken off ( cincin, rantai, subang, jam, etc). No eating 6 hours before and bra and panties off.
My first time in OT, there was a lone bed in the middle of a big cold room full of medical gadgets and apparatus. I laid down on the bed. The clock showed 3.20pm. 1 nurse held my right hand to take my blood pressure while simultaneously dr bius was poking my hand to insert the IV drip needle (or whatever you call it). Banyak betul benda going on at the same time. The the dr said that she was going to administer ubat bius. A nurse was putting oxygen mask on me and asked me to breath normally (how else to breath i wonder?). When the bius was inserted, it was quite painful. I remember telling the nurse "sakit jugak cucuk ubat bius ye", and she replied "memang sakit sikit". Fine. It was quite painful but I remember thinking to myself, let see how long before I am out. The next I know I hear nurses were talking to the dr at the far end of the room. Wanted to open my eyes but I felt groggy. Was wondering bila nak start procedure ni. Then I heard the nurses preparing me to go back to my ward. Aik.. dah selesai rupanya. I asked the nurse what was the time. It was 4pm apparently. I was out cold in a sec. Fuh.
I was still feeling groggy when they rolled me to my bed but the grogginess was nearly gone about half hour later. By 6pm I could be discharged. Felt some blood coming out but when I check there was not so many. The nurse did gave a bottle of what was taken out from me for me to see (it was just a half of bottle of reddish liquid, nothing solid). I was wondering if the IUCD was inserted as well since I felt nothing. No numbness, no soreness, no pain, nothing. Apparently it was fitted but gonna ask the dr still during my next check up just to confirm.
Now, 2 days after the op, physically I am ok, no pain, just some very very minor discomfort around the tummy area, nothing that I can't manage. Some lethargic feeling that comes on and off. Mabuk sikit at times. But that's it. But emotionally, I am on a roller coaster. I cried everyday since. No reason. I don't feel sad, I don't feel frustrated, I don't feel angry. I just feel like crying. I get angry real quick. I get tired real quick. And as sudden I feel calm and normal. Last nite I was crying out of frustration and stress. Coz I had to cook for sahur, Ariz was wailing like a crazy banshee who's foot got caught between the door, the kids were taking food while I was cooking. Ikan bilis je pun. And I was having a thumping headache, and feeling frustrated coz I had to drive to get Ariz from the daycare that evening coz hubs was stuck in a very bad jam. I felt so frustrated and stressed out that I join Ariz wailed in the room while trying to get him to sleep. Dia tengok mak dia melalak, dia pun melalak.
Today I am ok. Slept the whole day. The headache still persist but manageable. Feels tired mostly. I'm gonna allow myself to feel lemau for this week, but next week, we will move it move it. Letih betul badan lemau2 ni. Nak start exercise, takut tak boleh lagi tapi ada la sikit2 buat squat, pelvic exercises and some upper core exercises. Sikit tak banyak tapi jadi la dari tak ada ye dak?
Oh well, Right after this I'm gonna dive into work pulak. We are now in the middle of a very critical phase before the launch of a very critical product and I am at home. Gotta buck up and settle some work pronto. Dah janji nak bagi draft agreement by this week and today is already Thursday...
Oh well...
This is my story. A first for me. The first and the last I hope.
